Recently Untitled Document claimed to have ‘had’ blonde bombshell and Charlie’s Angels star Cameron Diaz. This was not true. In fact, Untitled Document has never even met Ms Diaz, and, thanks to the court, never will.

Untitled Document freely admits that it was the beer talking, and that the very idea is, frankly, laughable.

We offer our sincere apologies for any distress our comments may have caused Ms Diaz, her family or her PR team.

Seriously, though, Cameron. How about it?